Tuesday, 13 November 2007

BURRIDGE 4-1 HYTHE & DIBDEN

Saturday 10th November

The ball ran harmlessly out of play. Hythe attackers retreated into their defensive positions ready to face another goal-kick from Burridge goal keeper Ben Stansfield. It never came. The referee was pointing to the penalty spot. Before this moment Hythe had been putting most of their efforts into whining at the referee. Not even a throw-in decision against them on the half-way line could prevent then from becoming parodies of Ben Kingsley in the gangster flick - Sexy Beast, when trying to tempt ex-con Ray Winstone into one last bank job. Interesting then that not a single arm was raised in appeal. Burridge centre-half Paul Dyke was first on the scene, running towards the referee in disbelief.

"Fuckin’ Hell ref," he shouted. "For what?" The ref pointed to left-back Luke Sanderson, insinuating that he’d impeded Hythe’s inside right. For once Dyke was almost lost for words. He continued to protest whilst standing in front of the ball which was now placed on the penalty spot.

"Out the way you tosser," cried someone from the Hythe faithful. Dyke obliged out of duty rather than obedience. The penalty was scored. It didn’t matter. Burridge were already three goals up thanks to Jamie Hewitt, Sam Schwodler and Justin Newman. In Sexy Beast, Kingsley becomes such as aggressive nuisance that Winstone batters him to death with a shovel. Burridge did not use this method to defeat Hythe. They didn’t even use the tried and tested method of questioning their opponent's - who are from out of town - alleged confusion between family and carnal matters. They scored a fourth instead through Sam Hewitt.

7 comments:

pete said...

Another good win from you boys lets keep the momentim going into next weeks game.Still not crushing sides but as long as we win I am not complaining.the gaffer

Anonymous said...

And just for the record its 'Stanfield'!!

fields said...

pass it justin. don't shoot justin. oh for eff's sake, not from th... great goal justin.

Anonymous said...

Your not related to Lisa the singer from Rochdale?Been around the world cant find my baby yeah yeah.Hoof it goalie!!

Wilma said...

I once met Lisa Stansfield at the York branch of Waterstones, the one by the train station. No I didn't. It was Betty-Boo at Threshers. She was buying Red Stripe.

Rick Astley said...

Betty Boo? didnt she fall into the category of you would, but you wouldnt want your mates to find out...

pete said...

Went into Burridge club after training last night and it looks like the bar is closing shortly and moving to the cricket club house on a smaller scale. Very encouraging to see 17 of you training last night I appreciate your support many thanks the gaffer.

Looking back (bringing back the blog)

I haven't posted here since 2012 – that’s five years of not blogging. The blog is/was about Burridge AFC, the football team I played f...