Friday, 30 October 2009

Preview: Hythe & Dibden

(Pic: Roz H) Is Kev Willsher kicking the ball or has the ball sent him flying backwards like a cartoon baddie, into what one hopes will be a large pile of cardboard boxes?

Examining Willsher

Kev Willsher didn't want to listen to what Spandau Ballet were telling him. Not now. If he really was gold or indestructible, whatever that meant, why was he having to lay dead still in a cramped tube, in order for men in white coats to look inside his head? The answer wasn't in their music, that came piped through an enormous pair of headphones. They made Kev look like Princess Leia's open coffin funeral. Further evidence, if necessary, that Spandau's upbeat lyrics, although worthy sentiments, were slightly out of context with the circumstances Kev was faced with, but still he wished he could turn them up louder. Anything to silence the incessant pneumatic pounding of this MRI scan. A procedure that wastes no time in telling the patient that it's safe and painless, but neglecting to divulge the mental anguish it may cause. A procedure that was also unable to pinpoint just what had stopped Kev from playing football for pretty much two years.

Tapping Willsher

When Kev walked off the pitch at the final whistle on a warm April afternoon, Hythe were already celebrating. Beating Burridge 4-1 had clinched the divisional title. Kev didn't stop to join them. His shirt was slung over his shoulder, wet through the previous ninety minutes' efforts. Hythe's manager was still watching him. He saw in Kev a defender without pretensions to make the ball do pretty things, when he could be heading it several miles. He latched onto Kev before he'd even left the centre circle. Kev's detached politeness suggested embarrassment that Hythe hadn't the decency to make an arranged approach for him in the manner accustomed. Perhaps at an underwhleming cafeteria of a motorway service station or over a mid-week call to his land-line would be more discreet, as opposed to asking him to sign for Hythe right under the noses of his team mates. It was one prize that Hythe lost out on that day. Kev had already won his.

Previous games between Hythe & Dibden and Burridge:

Lost 1-3 (12th Sept '09) scorer: Bryn Schwodler
Lost 1-4 (18th Apr '09) Ben Rowe
Lost 0-1 (1st Nov '08)
Won 1-0 (2nd Feb '08) Bryn Schwodler
Won 4-1 (10th Nov '07) Jamie Hewitt, Sam Hewitt, Justin Newman, Sam Schwodler

Hythe & Dibden's last three results:

Michelmersh 0-3 Hythe & Dibden
Hythe & Dibden 2-1 AFC Hiltingbury
Sholing Sports 0-4 Hythe & Dibden

9 comments:

Jimmy Bastard said...

Get yourself into a good bookies. I was at a meeting last night where it was announced by John Reid that Celtic and R*****s WILL be joining the English Prem.

The odds will be long, but the price will be a wee beauty.

The only hold up now is the wrangling between ESPN and SKY.

Gorilla Bananas said...

That picture is fascinating. Did he fall on his arse afterwards? He must have done, surely.

Lulu LaBonne said...

Poor old Kev - MRI sounds beastly

What's the game result then?

Madame DeFarge said...

All he needs is a cowpat upon which to land. Perfect.

The Gaffer said...

Deserved result knew we could beat one of the top guns soon it has been coming.All of you worked your butts off lets move on from here very satisfying see you Wed the gaffer

Wilts said...

Sandy forgot to mention that i also had to endure Simply Red's holding back the years in that tunnel, all in all one of the worst experiences of my life! I still have nightmares about the ginger dread man today.

Yes was disappointed in the way hythe went about the approach. But i knew there was only going to be one answer, and my decision was vindicated when i see them struggling at the bottom of wessex premier while we are flourishing at the top of Southampton Senior one.

Great result saturday boys!

Emerson Marks said...

You heard it hear first; Jimmy says get to the bookies.

Kev seldom falls on his arse, Bananas.

Match report to follow this evening Lulu and Madame.

The Gaffer said...

netley away sat followed by london airways @ home

Anonymous said...

come on boys top of the league another good result sat against netley and we'll beginning to smell that silver polish-hutz

Looking back (bringing back the blog)

I haven't posted here since 2012 – that’s five years of not blogging. The blog is/was about Burridge AFC, the football team I played f...