Sunday, 24 February 2008

Burridge AFC 2-3 M&T Reserves

Saturday 23rd February

Yes, they're footprints on the roof of my car. Size nine baseball boots if I'm not mistaken, and that's not all. The perpetrator - no doubt using their index finger - had wiped away the grime from the roof of my Peugeot 405 and emblazoned in bold capitals the word, 'COCK.' No matter. Yes, great plumes of smoke are emitted from the exhaust every time I turn the ignition, the door locks have a mind of their own and now it's being used as a public right of way, but it gets me from A to B and when all's said and done that's all that matters.

Burridge understand that principle all too well. They had all the components at their disposal to see off M&T and get the three points they needed to get some kind of stranglehold on second place. M&T were held prisoners in their own half during the first forty-five minutes, Jamie Hewitt made it one-nil and mid way through the second half younger brother Sam made it two. There was not a shred of evidence from the game that the final ten minutes would become so painfully inexplicable for Burridge.

The box seat was Burridge's, they were in control, they could put daylight between themselves and Netley in third place. Nothing to worry about. But, many a battle has been lost in the head. Were these dizzy heights affecting Burridge? Maybe their collective unconsciousness could not accept this new position of control, and with that absence of worry began rooting through their minds looking for it as if maybe it was hidden under the sofa or behind the curtains. This process in itself can only whip up the biggest monster of them all - self doubt.

This game was best represented by the United States of America in 1961. Honest tax paying citizens, eating TV dinners from trays on their laps, obediently watching game shows from the television sets of the lounge of their houses that occupy the hundreds of tree lined streets of America. Things are going so well. It's two nil to Burridge. The U.S are conquering space. There's so much cause for optimism. Promotion here we come. They'll be man on the moon.

It's all too much for John F Kennedy, it's all too much for Burridge. Giving Marilyn Monroe one over his presidential desk in the White House, off his tits on prescribed barbiturates, only a reach away from the big red button, from a nuclear war, and he knows he shouldn't, but by God he wants to press it, but no, he mustn't. M&T score. Where did that come from? JFK has his brains blown out in Dallas and now a penalty kick for handball, but from whom? The fist of a defender from the grassy six yard box, that's who.
What now? Time running out, panic setting in, that lovely red button looking so appealing and whoosh, it's pressed. The wheels are in motion. Two missiles, one for Cuba and one for those commie swine in Moscow's Red Square. Here they come. Foul play by Kristian Hewitt (pictured above) - red card. Sam Hewitt tells the referee in no uncertain terms what he thinks of the decision and bang, he's off. The red card fills the grey skies of which it is held upon like some mushroom cloud. We have lost men. We have conceded a free kick. It is sent to the back post and even before a head meets it, its destination is clear. The net bulges. It is 3-2. It is a war in Vietnam that cannot be won. Hope and optimism have been replaced by sorrow and misery untold. Burridge will have to start again. Everything will have to start again.

3-5-2: Jones, M.Sanderson, K.Hewitt(c), Kelly, S.Schwodler (L.Sanderson), Newman (Dyke), Reeves, Baker, J.Hewitt, B.Schwodler, S.Hewitt


fields said...

That was a brilliant blog Mark.

There are many words that can describe that game. Unbelievable maybe. Ludicrous perhaps? Whatever you say about it, it was certainly eventful.

Hey, we dont really want to get promoted anyway! :)

Reynold said...

Well done to the ref on Saturday for getting most original screenplay at last night's Oscars.

fields said...

Yeah right, I wouldn't fancy the film much though. A bit far fetched isn't it. 2-0 down.. being awarded a dubious penalty to equalise.. scoring the winner with the last touch of the game.. never happen.

Oh, apart from in 'When Saturday Comes' of course. That's your favourite film isn't it Mark?

Mark said...

It's quite good, but nowhere near as good as Escape to Victory. Give me a pot of tea, a load of Wagon Wheels, a rainy Sunday afternoon and that film and I'm happy as larry.

Anonymous said...

fields first comment reveaals the truth - you lot don't really want to go up anyway.
Get Sam Schwodler back in goal, Dyke in the heart of defence and go and get 2nd place.

fields said...

I know, get Dyke in goal and go for 5th place.

Mark said...

Fifteen pounds from JJB sports, that's how much they cost. That was in 2002. They've finally succombed to wear and tear, with a hole on the outside of the right boot. I'l take them down the cobbler, course I will, but I know what his diagnosis will be. Second opinions will be no different. I'm sorry Mr Sanderson, there's nothing we can do.

They'll be some kind of ceremony to see these beauties on their way. Incidently, where does a man buy dubbin from these days? Can't seem to find it anywhere.

I remember my Golas, my Hi-Tecs, my Quasers (they split during a game at Botley Rec), my Kelme's. But my Lotto's? Well, I thought they'd go on as long as I would.

Patrick, that's waht I'll get next. Or maybe Hummell.

fields said...

Or you could splash out over £100 on some adidas predators again. and have them split after 1 weeks wear.

good old adidas.

Mark said...

That was ten years ago, I never played a game in them and I got a full refund from Simon Beckingham of Top Trainer, or whatever it was called on East Street.

Anonymous said...

I think all the chat was done on Saturday after the match on how we loss that game.Every time I think about it another chance comes to mind and the winning goal scored by a copper who arrived at half time after a late shift.see you all Wednesday.the gaffer

Anonymous said...

Dyke up front 12th - by Paul (Come on change the game) Dyke still soaking now!!!!

Looking back (bringing back the blog)

I haven't posted here since 2012 – that’s five years of not blogging. The blog is/was about Burridge AFC, the football team I played f...