Weapons of mass destruction
Should President Obama's administration be looking for a new type of missile to blow the North Korean capital of Pyongyang to smithereens, they need look no further than Marc Judd's left foot. Once encased in Adidas that size seven foot is easily capable of propelling a leather football with the necessary force to take down Kim Jong Il from a distance of up to 40 yards. That's 37 metres. Netley's crossbar can testify to the power. It was practically knocked off it's hinges when Judd smashed it from about two miles away.
(Pictured) Luke's chili - I have no quibble with the moist chicken, but did the sauce have too much poke?
So the Netley goal survived. As did Ryan Jones' legs, which fortunately for him are still attached to the rest of his body. Which came as a relief to Burridge mainly because many of Netley's players seemed unable to differentiate between a game of football and grievous bodily harm. It took a while for me to register why the Netley players responsible for trying to slice Jonesy's legs off were protesting so, for what in countries like North Korea would probably constitute the death penalty. Then it occurred to me that once you've deducted the £8 fine that a yellow card carries there isn't much left to spend from the weekly giro.
Half time score: Netley 1-0 Burridge
There was still a good ten minutes left to play, but Kristian Hewitt had had enough. He removed his goalkeeping gloves and walked off the field of play, in what appeared to be a protest against thuggery. It lasted approximately 10 seconds. As yet, there has been no approach from Ban Ki-Moon and the United Nations about offering Hewitt a position as an peace envoy in Millbrook.
Burridge XI that played Netley on Wedneday 8th April were:
Goalkeeper: Kristian Hewitt
Right back: Jay Schwodler
Centre half: Kev Willsher
Centre half: Marc Judd
Left back: Me
Right wing: Greg Baker
Centre mid: Fan's favourite, Justin Newman
Centre mid: Rich Allan
Left wing: Bryn Schwodler (legless: Ryan Jones)
Striker: Sam Hewitt (sub: Paul Andrews)
Striker: Sam Schwodler
Burridge take the 17 seater mini-bus up to Liverpool tomorrow morning for Richie Allan's stag weekend.
Kick off is at 8:30am.
......my neighbour Greg Baker's just popped over the hall asking for a lift over to Richie's tomorrow morning. He's dressed in nothing but his work shirt and his underpants....
Plus, I'm also concerned that the hotel room Lee Fielder and I are staying in will, as in Nottingham, have a double bed instead of two singles.